What kind of partner do you want to be at the birth?

Your role in your baby's birth doesn't start when you walk into the maternity unit. It starts during pregnancy. Preparing yourself doesn't mean learning a list of things you will have to do during the birth.

It starts with something much simpler: talking to each other. Ask her how she imagines the birth, what makes her feel safe, what worries her, and how she would like you to be present. Some women want plenty of touch and encouraging words, while others might need silence, space, or simply to know that you are there.

And you, how do you imagine this moment?

Maybe you have never seen a woman in labour. Movies are not a good example... How do you think you will feel if she is in pain, asks you if you think you should go to hospital, makes sounds you have never heard, doesn't want you to touch her, rejects a suggestion of yours, says “I can't do this anymore” or changes her mind about something you had talked about?

You don't need to have all the answers. Preparing yourself as a partner is about getting to know what she might need, but also recognising your own fears, doubts, and limits. The more you talk beforehand, the easier it will be to find your own way of being together when the time comes.

Over the next few weeks, we will cover more topics that can help you prepare for this moment.